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Use Your Negotiation Skills To Handle Difficult Conversations
The most important thing most of us learn from effective negotiations skills training is the importance to create a precise frame for a conversation, otherwise we are starting our discussions within the default frame of the other party. Here is a couple of points to take into account as you get ready for a difficult conversation.
1. Remember you are dealing with an individual who has dreams, hopes and aspirations similar to everybody.
When you have to deliver bad news, make certain you frame it sensitively. It is necessary for people to maintain their dignity and there is no reason to create resentment & resistance within your counterpart.
As an example, let's say you have had a poor performing member of staff who you have decided to let go.
One way of delivering the news could be:
Jayson, after carefully reviewing your track record and taking into account our past conversations about your poor performance, I have reached a final decision to discontinue your services. Unfortunately my decision is final and I need you to submit any outstanding items and depart with immediate effect.
Another way of delivering the news could be:
Jayson, it saddens me to inform you that I have decided to discontinue your services. I arrived at this resolution because it is important that there is a 100% fit between our expectations and your ability to deliver and I feel strongly that your skills is likely to be more appreciated in a different kind of role rather than this one.
If you feel that you really would like to continue in this type of position then I would really like to suggest that you pay attention to the following, and perhaps invest in further development in this respect. Thank you for having made the effort to meet our requirements and all the best with your long term initiatives.
In the second example you are at least recognising the fact that an effort was made on the part of the member of staff and that you are willing to help them refine their technique to enable them to be more effective in future.
2. Effective negotiation training confirms that we must recognize our weaknesses.
If you have done something for which you should apologise, do not shift the blame, but accept full accountability. We have a lot more respect for those who own up to their mistakes compared to those who dodge responsibility. Follow up your admission of guilt by asking the question how you can remedy the situation. Not many individuals have the expectation that everything must be perfect at all times. After all, people are all human and it is inevitable that you or anyone else for that matter will be making mistakes every once in awhile.
If you ask whatever it is that you can do to remedy the situation you will be surprised to learn that generally people will be more than happy with the fact that you apologised and will not demand anything additional aside from a guarantee that the error will not be repeated.
Remember to treat people with dignity and compassion. Even those folks who seem to be hard as nails often act this way as a defence against getting hurt.
It is not always simple to treat other people with respect and dignity but it is certainly an objective worth seeking, but use this advice and add to your sales training objectives, the results will speak for itself.
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